National Lampoon's Van Wilder ê ( R for language/sexuality )

Reviewed By Cathy Edsey Collins

Not Your Father's Animal House

Ryan Reynolds: Van Wilder	Tara Reid: Gwen
Kal Penn: Taj	Tim Matheson: Van Wilder Sr.
Daniel Cosgrove: Richard Bagg	Directed by: Walt Becker
Paul Gleason: Mr. McDoogle	Written by: Brent Goldberg, David Wagner

30 Second Bottom Line: In his seventh year at Coolidge College, Van Wilder is obviously not in any hurry to graduate with a degree in leisure studies-he is far too busy partying. When his wealthy father decides that his son has been "a poor investment" and cuts off funds, Van is forced to find ways of meeting his tuition payments or hit the streets. Meanwhile an intrepid journalism major is pursuing him for a feature story for the college newspaper. The duo end up falling for each other which angers her pre-med fiancé.

Tell Me More About It: There is a lot to be offended by in this lame, extraordinarily gross-out comedy and it is no small worry that-in spite of the film's "R" rating-impressionable teens will slither in to see this slop.

From the get-go we are shown the story's so-called hero enjoying oral sex from an older Asian woman. As the double entendres fly, it becomes obvious that the woman is a seamstress repairing his zipper and sucking a lollipop at the same time. Yuck, yuck.

And that opening scene is tame compared to the whole sequence involving Van's bulldog. The canine's huge testicles are the source of several silly jokes throughout the film but its final punchline is one of cinema's more disgusting moments.

In a move to mete revenge on Gwen's uptight fiancé, Van and his cohorts use the dog to fill a dozen éclairs with a filling that is a far cry from custard. Sprinkled with powdered sugar, the ominous dessert is wolfed down by the unknowing frat boys. The vomit factor here makes John Belushi popping that zit in "Animal House" seem like a "Sesame Street" gag.

"Van Wilder" tries to attach itself to those now-classic teen comedies by casting this embarrassment with the likes of Tim Matheson from "Animal House", Paul Gleason from "The Breakfast Club" and Curtis Armstrong from "Revenge of the Nerds". The presence of these grizzled has-beens does not make this film funny by association-it only make the audience want to rent their past glories in order to forget the exploits of slacker Van. Besides, will the target audience even know who these actors are? Did the movie's producers really think aging boomers would race to this garbage to revisit "old friends"?

The attempt to feed off past National Lampoon hits is evident in the casting of the smooth-talking Ryan Reynolds as the ultimate man on campus who instructs his admirers to "write that down" as he imparts his words of wisdom. His physical resemblance to Chevy Chase is striking as well as his body language and verbal cadence. The guy has talent-- too bad he was coerced into being part of this trash.

Ditto to Tom Everett Scott who seems incredibly uncomfortable in his minor role as the school's newspaper editor. What was he thinking or to whom did he owe a pound of flesh?

With its skeletal storyline that is only an excuse to give us topless tutors, anal sex and assorted sexual innuendo, "Van Wilder" is an assault on good taste and a new low in movie-making. But why should we be surprised when one of writer Brent Goldberg's film credits is "Saving Ryan's Privates"?

Rated R for strong sexual content, gross humor, language, some drug content

Cathyedsey@aol.com

Ryan Reynolds: TV's "Two Guys and a Girl"	Tara Reid: "American Pie"
Kal Penn: American Desi	Daniel Cosgrove: TV's "All My Children"
Tim Matheson: "Animal House"	Paul Gleason: "The Breakfast Club"